111 of the Most Useful Questions to Get to Know Yourself

The quality of your life is a direct reflection of the quality of questions you are asking yourself.

Tony Robbins¹

Here are some of the most useful questions to get to know yourself—you can ask yourself these questions to find out any number of things: who you are, what the hell you are doing in life, if you are on the right track, or even to see if you really give a shit about whatever it is that you are doing.

So, shall we begin?

1. Who am I? No, really, who the fuck am I when I remove all the external noise and influences?
2. What do I want? Again, what do I want when I remove what social media, past influences, and others have told me I want?
3. What do I want to want?
4. Who do I want to be in three years, excluding any external or material objects?
5. What is one thing I can do right now that aligns with who I want to be and takes less than 30 minutes to do?
6. Do I keep saying, “Tomorrow I will…”? Why?
7. What will I regret not doing in my life?
8. What matters to me?
9. Does this interest me? Is this interesting? Why or Why not?
10. Does this excite me? Is this exciting? Why or Why not?
11. Do I enjoy doing this?
12. Why am I doing this?
13. What would this look like if it were fun?
14. What would this look like if it were easy?
15. Does this peak my curiosity?
16. Am I doing what I want to do between when I wake up and when I go to sleep? If No, why not?
17. Is this really how I want to live?
18. How do I want to live?
19. How do I want to live right now?
20. If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? — Steve Jobs
21. Do I love this?
22. Am I making a positive or negative impact on the lives of those around me and strangers? How can I make a positive impact on the people around me?
23. What excuses am I telling myself right now?
24. What am I grateful for?
25. Do I want to improve at this?
26. Do I want to be the best at this?
27. Am I obsessed with doing this?
28. Am I making the hard choice or the easy choice?
29. Am I acting like the hero in the story of my life?
30. Do I like to exercise in the morning, afternoon, or evening?
31. What time do I get sleepy when I dim the lights in my place and don’t use technology after dinner?
32. When was the last time I let myself be bored?
33. What exact time is my peak energy level each day? Am I using that peak time in the most effective way?
34. What times am I actually hungry during the day?
35. Am I inventing things to do to avoid the important? What things am I inventing?
36. What is one thing I will achieve by the end of the year in each of the following: Mission/Career, Mind, Money, Personal Growth, Body, Friendships, Family, Romance, Soul?
37. What is the next best thing I can do right now?
38. Is this moving me closer to where I want to be and what is important to me?
39. What do I value? Does what I’m doing align with my values? Are my decisions made through the lens of my values?
40. What is my moral compass? What do I believe is right and wrong?
41. Is doing this teaching me new skills?
42. Is doing this increasing my value?
43. Is Monday my favorite day of the week? If No, why not?
44. What weakness did I overcome today? What virtue did I acquire?—Seneca
45. What will I do tomorrow?
46. What will I do tomorrow that I actually planned to do today?
47. Did I accomplish yesterday’s goals? If No, why not?
48. What do I fear most?
49. What am I avoiding due to fear?²
50. If I act every day as I did today, where will I be in three years? Three months?
51. Can I see myself going all in on this for three months? Three years?
52. Where am I trying to go in life? Why?
53. Am I trying to impress others?
54. Am I trying to impress myself?
55. Am I competing with myself or others?
56. What does a normal Tuesday look like for me?
57. What does my ideal Tuesday look like?
58. What does my ideal week look like?
59. Is this going to take a long time to be successful? If Yes, am I okay with that?
60. What exactly does “success” look like for me in three years? In life?
61. Has what I’ve been doing the last three weeks working?
62. What would I choose to do even if I knew that it would never work out and I wouldn’t be “successful” in the way I dreamed of being?
63. What am I willing to fail doing?
64. Do I care if I fail at this?
65. Is this my Last Chance to make this work?
66. What is the cost of not doing this? What are the consequences of not taking action — physically, emotionally, financially? What are the consequences of staying where I am and continuing to do what I have been doing?
67. What’s the worst that could happen and is it reversible?
68. What are the temporary and permanent consequences of doing this?
69. What am I giving up by choosing to commit to this? What will I have to sacrifice? Am I okay with giving those things up?
70. What knowledge and skills do I have to make $10,000 in three months?
71. What can I do with my time that is important? What am I willing to suffer for?³
72. What do some people find painful or difficult to do, but I actually find easy and enjoyable?
73. Will this take longer than two minutes to do? If No, why am I not doing it now?
74. What has been on my To-Do List for longer than three days? Is that “need to do it” playing in the background of my mind and causing me stress and anxiety?
75. What comes easy and natural to me?
76. If I could do one thing for the next 90 days in a row, what would it be?
77. What is a common narrative that continues to return in my life year after year? Is this through-line a problem or a passion?
78. What is beneath the surface of my passions? What do my passions tell me about the types of things I enjoy doing?
79. Is this in my control? If No, why won’t I let it go?
80. Am I addicted to the feeling of overthinking?
81. Why did I stop reading? How can I read more?
82. Am I taking big enough risks? Am I playing it safe and staying in my comfort zone?
83. What are three things I can do immediately when I am feeling stuck or in a low mood to get me out of the rut?
84. Who can I talk to that makes me feel better?
85. Does this person energize me or drain me?
86. Is it better for me if I plan my days hour by hour, in blocks, or down to the minute well in advance?
87. What foods do I eat that make me feel shitty? (Yes, I see the pun as well — I wrote the damn thing.)
88. What foods do I eat that make me feel more energized and not sleepy?
89. Did I smile today because I’m fucking alive?
90. Did I say Hello to someone first today?
91. Do I care about this person so much that if they needed something or got sick I would invent something to help them or search for the cure to save them?
92. Does this motivate me? What motivates me? What part of this motivates me?
93. What problems can I solve in the world? What kind of problems do I want to solve?
94. What problem does this solve?
95. Is there another way to look at this?
96. Do I want a life that I just “Let Happen,” or a life that I choose?
97. Who made these rules and why am I following them?
98. Am I being aggressive with life but passive and stable with my emotions?
99. Am I emotionally intelligent and how am I improving my emotional intelligence? Is it working?
100. Am I judging other people or myself all the time?
101. Am I exercising every day and lifting three times a week? Am I running in Zone 2 cardio for at least 100 minutes each week?
102. What is the smallest action I can take to get started on this thing that I want to do?
103. What is my unfair advantage?
104. Are the five people closest to me people I respect and admire?
105. Do I admire my partner and want to brag about him or her to my friends and family?
106. Am I overthinking this? Am I going all in and doing it or thinking about going all in and doing it?
107. Have I “healed” my past trauma? If No, why not?
108. Am I always doing what I say I’m going to do?
109. What am I truly capable of?
110. Am I happy?
111. What am I waiting for? No, really, what the fuck am I waiting for?

Well, I hope some of these questions to get to know yourself help.

(And yes, I totally cheated and combined some of these because I liked the sound of 111 Questions.)

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1. https://www.tonyrobbins.com/blog/ask-better-questions ↩︎
2. https://tim.blog/2017/05/15/fear-setting/ ↩︎
3. https://markmanson.net/question ↩︎

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